But . . . I'm Special
Today at lunch someone brought up the rules of the lunchroom fridge. The fridge in question is a surprising exception among workplace refrigerators because it's a remarkably law-abiding place. If you've spent any amount of time in the average American white-collar workplaces and stored any food in the icebox in that workplace, you've undoubtedly had your food stolen.
You know the feeling. You head to the lunchroom in anticipation of your sandwich or yogurt or homemade lasagna leftovers. You're looking forward to it and even took precautions by tattooing your name onto all of the flat surfaces with a Sharpie. Yet, when you open the brown paper bag or just look through the refrigerator, your quarry is nowhere to be found.
As your stomach sinks and your ears turn a bit red, you take an unsettling glance into the garbage can only to see the empty husk of your lunch. Or worse, that dude from the other side of the building with a spoon buried in your Yoplait.
Many of the thieves, if caught will feign ignorance. "What, this is *your* lasagna? I had no idea." However, I personally have been greeted with little more than a shrug and an "I was hungry."
That shrug comes from an attitude that I see nearly everywhere I go and nearly every day. It's a subtext to all kinds of irritating behavior. Basically, it's clear that the offender hears a voice in their head that expresses a huge sense of entitlement, "…but…I'm special!".
- No parking right in front of the store.
That doesn't mean me and my minivan because…I'm special. - No deployments of code on Friday afternoons.
But *my* situation is different because…I'm special. - Starting salary is $XX,XXX.
I need twice that, right out of college because…I'm special - I don't care if no one else gets a private office, I deserve one because…I'm special
The thing is, once you start translating people's rude behavior, you see just how common this subtext is. It's everywhere. And, I'm doing everything in my power to make sure that I'm not doing it myself. If you catch me, you have my full permission to give me a sarcastic "But I'm special" to get the point across.
June 25th, 2008 at 10:59 am
I subscribe to the "Mister Rogers Theory" which states that this can be traced to kids being told over and over by Mister Rogers that they're special.
June 26th, 2008 at 8:05 am
I definitely get that as a potential root cause. There has to be a balance between Mr. Rogers' 100% special approach and some of the crap kids are told about themselves.
They're neither so special that their desires trump those of others nor are they stupid and ugly just because the idiot they've got for a parent says so.
I know that interviews with Mr. Rogers revealed that in many cases, he was really aiming at those kids, for whom Mr. Rogers' affirmation was likely the only one they heard every day.
That said, the majority of an entire generation of parents took that whole mantra to a new level and ran with it, never telling their kids no, always praising them as little geniuses, etc.